The school year is winding down again. I regret to announce that the planning didn't fall into place for us to go on Monique's wish trip this March break but she is looking forward to going very soon. I will make sure to let you know how everything turns out.
There has been a few changes in life lately which are a little difficult to absorb and explain. Monique now attends the school where I teach. I find this much easier as I can see for myself how her daily routine is going and how she is feeling.
Our last appointment at the Heart centre was o.k. The news we receive is never 100% positive but always optimistic. The measurements for Monique's aorta seem a little large and concerning. Her cardiologist wants an MRI done in the fall in order to get a better look. She had MANY questions this last visit. She watch her echo and asked what all the different parts and sounds were. When she met with her cardiologist he assured her that she should not worry about her heart. She said she did sometimes. She was in the hospital twice this past winter with the flu and chest pains. We spent March break in the hospital.
What will next year bring for Monique? I am unsure! I don't know. I wish I did. I wish I could tell her she never has to go through so much pain again. But I can't. As a mother it tears me apart. I feel as if I did something wrong to cause her to have to live this life. She does not know ay other life. But I know the difference. This is not the life you want your children to have. Parents who do not have sick children like we do say they understand but, they don't. I can appreciate them trying to imagine what it would be like. But nobody understands quite like other CHD parents.
Then & Now
3 years ago
2 comments:
"I feel as if I did something wrong to cause her to have to live this life." This is my sorrow every day--and our recent cardiology appts have resulted in much more positive news than it sounds like you have received. But the fact that there are appointments at all... the fact that my six-year-old plays not just doctor but echocardiogram with her brother...and they both know what it is and what to do. And that's leaving out the really hard stuff.
Be glad. She is healthy and happy NOW, so embrace it. Whatever the future brings, you will deal with it then. You will worry yourself silly if you're not careful. My best advice, what I wish my mother had done, was to keep informed, but always be positive. Be the biggest cheerleader and advocate for your child. Don't be satisfied with answers you don't like. Children look to their parents on how to feel much of the time. She will never be normal, but that just means she's special.
Post a Comment